MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS AS A WARM-UP ACT

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #103 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS AS A WARM-UP ACT

The Midlife Memos blog has shed light on friendship frenzy.
These posts have suggested ways to celebrate quality friendships and encouraged
you to release difficult ones.

Friendships are just a warm-up.
It's time to move forward and examine other double milestone connections.

As we navigate menopausal mayhem and aging angst, some days it feels like
just about all our relationships have become unsettled.

Have you noticed bonds with romantic partners, family, colleagues and,
even, neighbors are changing?
Some are strained, others are shaky.
Several already have disintegrated.
Happily, a precious few remain strong (ummmm ... depending on the day).
What a perfect opportunity to ask my favorite question, "Is it me?"

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Midlife Memos is taking a break.
While you continue building quality friendships, I will be busy finishing
my next book. The topic - Sexuality After 50.  Uh-huh!!!

UNHOMEWORK
With some tweaking, apply the strategies offered in Midlife Memos and
Help! I Am Surrounded By Bitches ... to other relationships.
Stay in touch.
More to come.

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to navigate the murky waters
of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes and effective solutions in Help! I Am
Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid Menopausal
Mayhem And Aging Angst.
Available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble

NEXT TOPIC
Check in for updates.

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:         www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012' '2103.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

WILL YOU ACCEPT YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDS? CAN YOU?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #102 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
WILL YOU ACCEPT YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDS? CAN YOU?

Is it possible to keep friends that don't quite measure up to your friendship
criteria? In other words, can you choose to accept friends as they are - not as
you want them to be?

Have you found at least one reason to accept friends despite their
flaws, quirks and annoyances?
How is that working out?

Maybe, you're hoping your friends' unpleasant, negative traits
will disappear.
Do you believe in magic?

Or, you are playing 'let's make a deal.'
If you accept your friends' flaws, quirks and annoyances, they
will accept yours.
Good luck.

Perhaps, you have decided to lower your expectations.
Is one quality friendship trait enough - no matter how many negatives?
This is a personal decision, but question why you are settling.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Always aim high.
Resist the urge to 'settle.' 

UNHOMEWORK
List the friends you have decided to accept as they are?
Why?
Prioritize your friendship criteria.
Decide what quality traits are 'must haves.'

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration and information to navigate
the murky waters of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes and effective solutions in Help! I Am
Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid Menopausal
Mayhem And Aging Angst.

www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife transitions

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:         www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

WHO WILL NEVER BE YOUR MIDLIFE FRIEND?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG # 101 by Wendy Kyman, PhD
WHO WILL NEVER BE YOUR MIDLIFE FRIEND?

Do you wish to be friends with your family?
Is this wish impossible to fulfill because you are engaged in bitter feuds with siblings?
Is your #1 enemy a sister or brother?

Long-time feuds:
No matter what caused the estrangement, or how long ago the fighting began,
having family members as enemies is horrible. Almost always it is worse than having
friends as enemies.

Feuds unique to families:
If you're a double milestoner and still have parents - lucky you.
As parents settle into their golden years, one or both may need assistance.
Decisions have to be made for their care.
Increase in parents' needs = increase in our stress levels.
This situation is ripe for emotional outbursts among siblings.

For some families, disagreements may escalate into bitter animosity.
Causes:
~ Money, Money, Money
Interestingly, sibling conflicts are less likely when parents have little or no money.
When parents have money, siblings argue how it should be spent now and divided later.

~ Compare and Contrast Contests
Sibling rivalries tend to be unleashed when caretaking parents.
Sisters and brothers quarrel: who is doing more, who is doing less and who
is doing absolutely nothing (except giving orders and making demands).

~ Doing It All
Resentment builds quickly when one sibling does the parents' daily caregiving.
Perhaps, the other siblings live far away and can not (will not) travel to care-take parents.
Or, they claim to be 'too busy.'
Anger erupts when non-involved siblings make decisions that impact the involved sibling.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Each sibling must be responsible for at least one parent-related task.
No excuses (except their own medical issues).
Long-distance siblings may further contribute by hiring (paying) health aides to assist with
parents' care. The sibling providing daily care will appreciate the help.

UNHOMEWORK
If you are feuding with siblings:
~ Do you fight with friends the way you fight with siblings? Can you imagine doing so?
~ Is there any chance for family reconciliation?
~ What must be done to heal?
If you are not feuding with siblings:
~ Celebrate with big family hugs.

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to navigate the
murky waters of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes and effective solutions in
Help! I Am Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid
Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst.

www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
If I accept you, will you accept me ... ?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

FAMILY AS MIDLIFE FRIENDS

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #100 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
FAMILY AS MIDLIFE FRIENDS

Double milestoners grew up in a time when many families had several
children born close in age.
Thus, it's probable you have siblings also navigating the double
milestone.

For those with brothers: Men go through their version of a double milestone.
They, too, have hormonal mayhem and aging angst.
Why should women have all the ... er ... fun?

The sibling connection is powerful.
Aside from DNA, sisters and brothers share uniques memories - especially
of people, places and events.
At this point in life, it's so helpful to have siblings fill in the (ever increasing) memory blanks.
If you're able to add unconditional love for each other to the mix, you are very fortunate.

Having siblings as best friends is one of life's special gifts.

Sadly, for some siblings the reverse is true.
You may be engaged in wicked feuds with your sisters and brothers.
As a result, you are bitter enemies.
(Stay tuned for more on this topic.)

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Double milestoners with no siblings often have close relationships with cousins.
Apply the comments and unhomework to your cousins.

UNHOMEWORK
Are you friends with your brothers and sisters?
Were you always friends?
Did you have to 'work' to become friends?
Is there anything that would cause you to feud with your siblings? Specify.

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration and information to navigate the
murky waters of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes and effective solutions in
Help! I Am Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid
Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst.

www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
It is impossible for family to be friends when ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:         drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:   www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:       www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

MIDLIFE FRIENDS AS FAMILY

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #99 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDS AS FAMILY

Generally, the bonds holding a family together are stronger than bonds
holding a friendship together.
Agree? Disagree?

Do you have friends you consider family?
What qualifies a friend as family?
Choose:
~ length of time you know each other
~ shared experiences, e.g raising children, vacationing together, sharing holidays
~ compatibility
~ desperation
~ other

 Sometimes, friends form a replacement family to take the place of actual
family that is estranged, long-distance, passed away, etc.
Or
We take a friend into our existing family because ----- (fill in the blank).

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Some folks casually designate friends as family.
Others rarely, or never, designate friends as family.

UNHOMEWORK
Do you have any friends as family?
What characteristics must a friend have to be selected as family?
Are you part of a friend's family? How is that working out?
EXTRA CREDIT
We know most families spend years living together.
With that in mind, would you be able to share a home with any of your friends?
For how long?

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to navigate the
murky waters of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes, and effective solutions in Help! I
Am Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid
Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst.

www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Family as friends tend to be ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

RE-CHOOSING MIDLIFE FRIENDS

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #98 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
RE-CHOOSING MIDLIFE FRIENDS

Imagine:
You move to a town or city where you don't know anybody.
One of your top priorities is to meet people and make friends.

Imagine further:
You are introduced to your current friends in the new location.
However, you're meeting and learning about them for the first time.

Ideally:
We re-choose our current friends again and again and again.

Reality:
We re-choose some friends, but not others.
This is a case of if I knew then what I now know ...

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Fantasy do-overs are fun and enlightening.

UNHOMEWORK
Would you choose any of your current friends (who they are now) as friends if you
met them today?
List the ones you would choose.
What have you learned about each friend that would cause you to re-choose her?
List the ones you would not choose.
What have you learned about each friend that would cause you not to choose her?

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to navigate the murky waters of
menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes, and effective solutions in Help! I Am Surrounded
By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst.

www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
... friends as family are ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is published weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

CHEERING FOR OUR MIDLIFE FRIENDS

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS GUIDE® TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #97 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
CHEERING FOR OUR MIDLIFE FRIENDS

What a concept - midlife cheerleaders.
Clearly, we don't have to wear skimpy outfits and shake our ... ummm ... pom poms (unless you
want to), but all of us need cheerleading - especially now.
The essence of cheerleading is to root with sincere enthusiasm.
Wouldn't it be wonderful if midlife friends cheered with sincere enthusiasm for each other.

What is there to cheer for during the double milestone of menopausal mayhem and aging angst?
Simply - anything and everything.
Success and accomplishments range from quitting smoking (for the 16th time), exercising (finally), job promotion (well-deserved), to winning The Nobel Peace Prize for curing hot flashes (why not).

As we strive to achieve success and accomplish goals, quality friends encourage
and support each other.
When we achieve success and accomplish goals, quality friends are happy
for us.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Authentic cheerleading is more than the usual compliments and congratulations.
It is genuinely rooting for others.
No tinges of envy, jealousy, or insincerity are allowed. Seriously.

UNHOMEWORK
Is anyone truly cheerleading for you? Who?
Are you truly cheerleading for anyone? Who?
Are you truly cheerleading for yourself? In what ways?

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to navigate the murky waters
of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes, and effective solutions in Help! I Am
Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid Menopausal
Mayhem And Aging Angst.

Available:
www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
... would you re-choose your current friends if ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:         www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, the earlier Midlife Memos, especially 'The Birth
of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

IS IT DISLOYAL TO END MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #96 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
IS IT DISLOYAL TO END MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS?

Loyalty is an honorable trait.
It is essential for relationships.
Except, when it's not.

Loyalty is an honorable trait, until ... it becomes a misguided obligation.
We are not obligated to stay in negative, hurtful relationships.
In fact, we are obligated to end them.

Wait. Isn't it disloyal to end friendships, especially long-term friendships?
As you (hopefully) know by now, our first loyalty is to honor ourselves.

Express loyalty to yourself by committing (or recommitting) to your well-being.
To do this - Surround yourself with loving, positive-energy folks who enrich your
life and enhance your joy.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Releasing the strangling bonds of negative, hurtful friendships is
an important step in respecting, honoring, and caring for ourselves.

UNHOMEWORK
Do you feel a misguided sense of loyalty to some relationships?
What you are willing to tolerate in order to express loyalty? To whom?
Is your loyalty based on personal choice or sense of moral obligation?
Is your loyalty reciprocal? Describe.

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to navigate the murky waters of
menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes, and effective solutions in
Help! I Am Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst. 

www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
... wouldn't it be wonderful if midlife friends cheered with sincere enthusiasm for ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially 'The Birth
of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate. 

DO YOU TRUST YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDS?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #95 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
DO YOU TRUST YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDS?

Are you friends with folks you do not trust?

First, let's define 'friendship trust.'
TYPES OF TRUST
1. You trust friends to offer support = reliable.
2. You trust friends to tell the truth = honest.
3. You trust friends to keep confidences = discreet.
4. You trust friends to provide excellent judgement = wise.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
It is a special gift to have at least one reliable, honest, discreet, wise friend = trustworthy.
Cherish this gift.

UNHOMEWORK
~ List your friends.
~ Rate level of trust for every friend - either: 'high', 'so-so', 'non-existent', or 'unsure.'
~ Be specific. What do you trust and not trust in each friend?
~ Look inward. Can your friends trust you? How do they rate your level of trust?
~ Be specific. What does each friend trust and not trust about you?
EXTRA CREDIT
~ Add additional 'types of friendship trust' to the definition.

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to
navigate the murky waters of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes, and effective solutions

in Help! I Am Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst.

www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com














NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
... friendship loyalty is an honorable trait, except when it's not ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:         www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click on '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

ARE YOU TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MIDLIFE MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #94 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
ARE YOU TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS?

What kind of weird question is this?
Of course we all tell the truth about friendships.
Always.
Well ... maybe not.

Do you assume the question concerns telling the truth to your friends.
Actually, it concerns telling yourself the truth about your friends - Ohhhhh!

In other words ...
when you answer 'friendship questions,' such as those posed today and
in past Midlife Memo posts
~ do you state what you feel/think?
or
~ do you state what you assume you're expected to feel/think?

For example ...
One question from last week's post was: 'Do you want to fix what's broken (in friendships)?'
Before the double milestone, many of us would have said 'sure, of course.'
We probably would have meant it - er - maybe, sometimes.

Now ...
For various reasons, we don't want to fix friendships (or most anything).
But, we answer 'yes, we do.'
Why?

Because ...
- it is the right thing to say.
- it is the expected thing to say.
- we don't want to hurt our friends' feelings.
- yada, yada, yada.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
As we navigate menopausal mayhem and aging angst, we get more and more
adept at letting go of the expected response.
It's quite refreshing to express truth and say what we think and feel.

UNHOMEWORK
Pay attention to your reactions when expressing what you think and feel.
Rate your level of comfort when expressing your reality.

REMINDER
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to navigate the
murky waters of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes, and effective solutions.
www.amazon.com
www.barnesandnoble.com

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
'can midlife friendships survive when ... ?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

REPAIRING MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #93 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
REPAIRING MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS

After the midlife friendship purge ...

Step 3
Repair

This step requires serious thought ... seriously, serious thought.
a. Specify what aspects of your friendship need repair.
b. Can the broken parts be fixed? How?
c. Do you want to fix what's broken? Why? Why not? Unsure. Don't care.
d. What are you willing to do to repair the friendship?
e. What are you not willing to do to repair the friendship? Detail your limits, if any.
f.  Does your friend want to fix what's broken? How do you know?
g. Do you believe your friend has a commitment to repairing the friendship?
h. Is the damage irreparable? In what ways?

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Similar to the previous 'after the midlife friendship purge' steps, the reciprocity angle comes
into play. Both friends must acknowledge and agree to what's broken, the repairs that need to be
made, and how to go about healing the friendship.
Good luck. You will need it.

UNHOMEWORK
Do you want more detailed guidance, inspiration, and information to navigate the murky
waters of menopausal/midlife friendships?
You'll find practical knowledge, relatable anecdotes, and effective solutions in
Help! I Am Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst.
My book is available at Amazon.com and other book outlets in both paper and ebook.

To get a copy click on this link:
http://www.amazon.com/Help-Surrounded-Bitches-Friendship-Menopausal/dp/0988279509/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1365010543&sr=8-1&keywords=wendy+kyman

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Is it worth it to ...?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, or the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

MAINTAINING QUALITY MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #92 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MAINTAINING QUALITY MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS


AFTER THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP PURGE
STEP 2

Are you fortunate enough to have at least one quality friendship remaining
after the double milestone friendship purge?
Congratulations.

Will this always be a quality friendship?
Hopefully - yes.
Possibly - no.
Are there ways to increase the possibility of keeping this friendship - of course.

Step 2                
~ Maintenance ~
Quality friendships require maintenance.
Sprinkle your friendships with copious amounts of love, attention, kindness, and
respect.
If it is truly a quality friendship, it will flourish.

REMINDER
Step 1 is in previous post.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Reciprocity plays a role in maintenance. Both friends must tend to the friendship.

UNHOMEWORK
What is your reaction to Step 2?
Do you regularly maintain your quality friendships? In what ways?
Are your friends reciprocating?
Is it more of an effort to maintain quality friendships during the double milestone? (Trick question)

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
One more step  ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:        drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:  www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:      www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

AFTER THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP PURGE - NOW WHAT?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #91 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
AFTER THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP PURGE - NOW WHAT?

During the double milestone, we lose friendships.
We dump some; others dump us - aka the purge.
Wicked, but true.

AFTER THE PURGE
Take a look around.
Is anyone left standing?
Are there at least one or two quality friendships remaining?  Yay! Give a loud cheer.
Do you have more than two quality friendships? Double Yay! Lucky you.
If not one friend remains - Sigh!  (Stay tuned for tips to create quality friendships.)

NOW WHAT DO WE DO?
Actually, there are several steps.
Let's begin with the first.
~ Gratitude ~
To friends - tell them you're grateful they are in your life, and why.
To yourself - appreciate the gift of quality friendships.

REMINDER
One quality friendhip is soooo much better than ten non-quality friendships.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Appreciation and gratitude go hand-in-hand.

UNHOMEWORK
Are you finished with the purge of negative friendships?
How many quality friendships remain?
You know this already, but in case your aging memory needs a reminder -
sing, shout, or chant the following: 'quality is more important than quantity!'

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
the next step after the double milestone friendship purge ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is published weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:               www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:         www.facebook.com/drwendykyman@gmail.com
Twitter:             www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

A MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP SCENARIO

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #90 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
A MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP SCENARIO

Have you heard a version of this midlife friendship scenario?
Actually, I bet you have heard countless versions.

Two women have been friends for decades.
~ One is extremely needy.
She relies on her friend to be available all day, everyday.
~ The other is generous with her time and energy.
She does her best to be available for her friend.

Both women reach the double milestone.
As each enters menopausal mayhem and aging angst, the friendship
dynamic changes.

The needy friend - you guessed it - gets more needy.
She asks for more and more.
And ... the giving friend  - limits her availability.
Eventually she exclaims, 'no more.'
Uh-oh!!!

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
This is just one example of the friendship changes that
occur during the double milestone.

UNHOMEWORK
Do you have a friendship similar to the one described?
Which of the two friends most resembles you?
How has the friendship dynamic changed since the onset of the double milestone?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife friendships should include ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate

MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP SUPER POWERS

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #89 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP SUPER POWERS

Do you use your double milestone super powers?

They come in handy when we're getting acquainted with a potential
new friend.
Extraordinarily bright and clearly marked signals alert us if this will be
a non-reciprocal (one-sided) friendship.
We are so done with those.
Our sharpened senses alert us to run away

If only these super powers would work their magic on one-sided
long-time friendships.
Our double milestone heightened awareness highlights (shouts out)
the one-sided nature of these old friendships.
But ... we have been friends forever and running away is not so easy.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Do you think forever-friends and potential new friends require different strategies?
Maybe, maybe not.
The only way to find out is to experiment.

UNHOMEWORK
Continue using the 'reciprocal only' policy on potential friends.
Apply this policy to at least one forever-friend.
Record your thoughts, insights, and overall reactions.

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Two friends have been friends for decades and then ...


HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the previous Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP WAITING

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #88 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP WAITING

Has this happened to you?
You have given generously to a friend during her bad/low/down times.
Then, something goes wrong in your life. You turn to your friend, but ...
all she offers are excuses, excuses, and - what a surprise - more excuses for
her inability to be there for you.

At this point in life, we understand that true reciprocity occurs over the
life of a relationship.
Every one of us has good/ bad times, highs/ lows, ups/ downs.
~ Be grateful if you have more joy than despair.
~ Appreciate if you share it all with quality friends.
~ Acknowledge some friends rather take than give.
~ Are you ready to stop waiting for the takers to become givers?

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Double milestone friendship frenzy heats up when we realize one (or more)
of our relationships has not been, nor will never be, reciprocal.

UNHOMEWORK
List the friends you can count on to reciprocate your generosity.
List the friends who are full of excuses explaining why you cannot count on them.
List the excuses you believe; accept. Why?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
You know when it's reciprocal ... ?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:         www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP MATH

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #87 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP MATH

MYTH or REALITY
Equality exists in friendships.
Giving=Taking

Measuring friendship equality seems clinical, distasteful, and
just plain silly.
Perhaps, but ... lack of reciprocity is a major friendship
complaint - particularly during menopausal mayhem and aging angst.

Why are we now noticing friendship equality and complaining about inequality?
The double milestone triggers heightened sensitivities.
We tend to notice things that were previously overlooked or ignored.

For some of us, we take note, complain a bit, and move on.
For others, we take note, complain a lot, and cannot move on.
Instead, we enter friendship frenzy.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Here is a sign.
~ If you begin doing math, it is a clue that the frenzy is getting pumped up.
Double milestone math includes counting up the amount of times we
give and our friends take.

UNHOMEWORK
Are your relationships equal or unequal?
How do you know?
Do you want to change the equation?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Are you still waiting for your midlife friends to ...?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:         www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

DO YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS BALANCE OUT?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS ® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #86 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
DO YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIPS BALANCE OUT?

Do you have balance in your midlife friendships?
This is another way of asking if your friendships are reciprocal.

Measuring friendship 'give and take' seems ... er ... well ... unfriendly.
Aren't we supposed to be generous with our friends?
Yes, of course.

But then ask yourself, why is it that our unbalanced relationships are
usually the first to fall apart during menopausal
mayhem and aging angst.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
With quality friendships, the giving and taking balance out - over time.
How much time? Ahhhh - double milestoners know this answer.
 
UNHOMEWORK
Take measure of your friendships.
Is there reciprocity?
Do you give more or take more?
Specify.

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Equality in midlife friendships is ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

ARE YOU ASKING TOO MUCH FROM MIDLIFE FRIENDS?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #85 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
ARE YOU ASKING TOO MUCH FROM MIDLIFE FRIENDS?

Previously, we questioned when to say enough is enough to a friend when she asks
too much from us.
Let's flip the questions and explore our friends' perspectives.

Have any friends ever told you enough is enough?
Have any friends ever said you're asking for too much?

Was it one friend who told you enough is enough because you are asking too much?
Was it several or ... most (OUCH!)... friends who told you this?
What are you asking for that elicits your friends' responses?

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Exploring our friends' perspectives is a necessary component in building quality
relationships.

UNHOMEWORK
How do you react when friends say enough or too much?
Are you actually asking too much from friends, or are they unwilling, perhaps, unable
to respond in the ways you want and need?
How many times do you ask friends for something before you accept they are unwilling
or unable to respond in the ways you want and need?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Do you have reciprocal midlife friendships ... ?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com.@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.' Keep scrolling all
the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially 'The Birth of
Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.




  
.

WHAT IS TOO MUCH FOR A MIDLIFE FRIEND TO ASK ?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #84 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D
WHAT IS TOO MUCH FOR A MIDLIFE FRIEND TO ASK?

Is there such a thing as too much?
Is there ever a time when enough is enough?

What is too much for a friend to ask of you?
Under what circumstances will you tell a friend enough is enough because
she has asked too much?
Do you exempt any friends from your too much or enough is enough policy?
Since the double milestone of menopausal mayhem and aging angst,
have you changed what is enough?

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
The double milestone is the perfect time to pose, ponder and, when ready, answer
questions. This process enhances insight.

UNHOMEWORK
Here are potentially uncomfortable, but important questions:
Are friends actually asking too much, or is it that you are limited in
what you are able to give? Be specific.
Are friends actually asking too much, or is it that your are limited in
what you are willing to give? Be specific.
.
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Are you the one asking too much ...?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly. If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you
will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:        www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

ARE PSYCHIC ABILITIES A MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP REQUIREMENT?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #83 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D
ARE PSYCHIC ABILITIES A MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP REQUIREMENT?

Do friends know what you want and need from them?
Do you know what friends want and need from you?

Some folks with advanced psychic abilities are supposedly able to read minds.
Imagine having a skill that makes it unnecessary to ask uncomfortable
questions or have dreaded discussions.
On the other hand, do you really want to know what goes on in the minds of others?

For us non-psychics, we have a choice.
Either sharpen psychic abilities or have frank discussions with friends concerning
needs, wants, changes, ...

During the double milestone, neither choice suits us.
Why?
- We are not in the mood
- We fear the consequences

Instead, we make assumptions.
- We assume to know what friends want and need.
- We assume friends know what we want and need.

How's that working out for you?

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Have you heard what happens when we assume?
It makes an ... (fill in the blank) out of u and me
Obviously, it's never a good idea.

UNHOMEWORK
What assumptions do you make?
Do you assume friends want and need the same things you do? Give details.

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
The consequences we fear the most are ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly. If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will
automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:             www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:       www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:           www.twitter.com.@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.' Keep scrolling all the
way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially 'The Birth of Swamp
Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

ARE YOUR YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP REQUIREMENTS BEING MET?

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #82 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D
ARE YOUR MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP REQUIREMENTS BEING MET?

Are your friendship requirements being met?
This question leads to more questions.
Reminder: All questions are designed to clarify thoughts and gain insight.

Preliminary questions:
1. What are your friendship requirements?
2. Have you expressed your requirements to friends?
3. What feedback did you receive?

Strategy questions:
4. What is the plan if friends do not meet your requirements?
5. What is the plan for fulfilling your friends' requirements of you?
Gulp! More things to think about.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Puzzling question:
6. Is there anyone who believes friendships are easy - especially during the double milestone
of menopausal mayhem and aging angst?

UNHOMEWORK
One additional question.
7. Do you distinguish between friendship expectations and requirements?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC 
(another question!)
Is psychic ability one of your friendship requirements ... ?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly. If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you
will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email           www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter         www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' 2012.' Keep scrolling all the way
to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.'
I bet you will relate.

MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP REQUIREMENTS

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #81 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP REQUIREMENTS

Ideally:
We have expressed our midlife friendship expectations to friends.
We have listened to our friends' expectations of us

Reality:
Some of us have followed through with those plans.
And, others are waiting for .... ?

Once friendship expectations have been addressed, there's more. Oh goody!
We move to the next level - friendship requirements.
Requirements are deal breakers, bottom lines, must-haves.

We all have requirements.
Not all of us enforce* them, all of the time.
Do you?

*Enforce = ending friendships if requirements are not met.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
As we journey through the double milestone, deal breakers, bottom lines and must-haves,
are likely to change. Have yours?

UNHOMEWORK
Identify your friendship requirements.
What must your friendships have (or not have) in order to survive?
What must your friendships have (or not have) in order to deepen and grow?
Do you enforce these requirements?
Do you make exceptions? For whom? Why?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Additional friendship requirements include ...?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:         www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, the earlier Midlife Memos,
including 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

MIDLIFE MAGIC FOR THE NEW YEAR

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #80 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE MAGIC FOR THE NEW YEAR

Another year has passed.
A new one is opening before us.
Did you make resolutions?
For most double milestoners, we don't make promises anymore.
Why bother.
We never seem to keep them.
At this point in our lives, we can no longer trick ourselves into believing our own promises.
Is this a good thing?

Was it better to believe that we would accomplish specific goals each new year?
Perhaps the problem was they were always the same old, tired resolutions.
You know the ones: lose 10 lbs, practice yoga, read the classics, blah, blah, blah.

What if we give ourselves a fresh start to this New Year.
Throw out the word 'resolution.'
Think in terms of giving yourself a gift.
This year, give yourself the gift of doing at least one magical thing.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Of course, if we resolve to do at least one magical thing, we have to define magical. Ahhhh!
I will leave that to you.
CLUE:  I purposefully did not use special or wonderful.  Been there, done that with past resolutions.
Don't you agree we need something magical while journeying through menopausal mayhem and aging angst?

UNHOMEWORK
Are you going to give yourself the gift of doing at least one magical thing this year?
If yes, you are off to a great start.
No pressure. Allow yourself the time and space to define magical.

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Are you keeping your midlife friendships in the New Year ... ?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe,' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION:
Email:               drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:         www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
Twitter:             www.twitter.com/@drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.