MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP BETRAYAL

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #60 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP BETRAYAL?

Here's more fallout from friendship breakups ...

When we end a friendship, our mutual friends may feel compelled
to take sides.
It is fine if mutual friends take our side, but what if they do the unthinkable ... they
take our new non-friend's side. OWWW!

Best case scenario:
Our mutual friends do not take sides.

Usual scenario:
Things are awkward at first, but eventually the tension eases and everything
and everyone settles down.

Worst case scenario:
Our mutual friends take sides, form alliances, shut us out, and we loose
these friends as well. Double OWWW!!

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
When we ended one friendship, we did not plan for the loss of more.
Typically, it is 11 year old girls who side with one friend and shut out the other.
Do double milestoners revert back to pre-adolescence? Perhaps.

UNHOMEWORK
Imagine:
You enter a restaurant and notice your new non-friend enjoying dinner and lively
conversation with one of your close friends.
What is your reaction - anger, sadness, disappointment, surprise, indifference, or ____ ???
- Is your reaction dependent on your dinner partner ?
- What if you are dining alone? Does it change your response?
- Rate your sense of betrayal from 0 - 10.  Explain your score.
Bonus questions:
- Do you stop by their table and say, 'hello?'
- Or do you say something else? (Uh - huh, I thought so.)

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
... I want my midlife friendships to be ...

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TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
The Birth of Swamp Goddess. I bet you will relate.