AFTER THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP BIG TALK

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #42 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
AFTER THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP BIG TALK


Have you followed through with your plans for The Big Talk? Why? Why not?
Did you tell your friend exactly how you feel? Everything?
What did you leave unsaid? Why?

How did your friend react?
What was your response to your friend's reaction?

Will you have The Big Talk with another friend? Why? Why not?
If yes, will you change any part of your plan?

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
The purpose of The Big Talk is to resolve friendship issues.
After all our discussions, you may choose not to go through with The Big Talk.
It is not always the best choice.

UNHOMEWORK
If you did follow through with The Talk:
- List the positives and negatives of your Talk.
- Indicate the parts of your plan that were successful and those that were not.
- Did anything unexpected occur?
If you did not have The Talk:
- Do you have a back-up plan? Describe.

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
It's Over
... you did your best ... Really?

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     www.facebook.com/drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially 'The
Birth of Swamp Goddess.' I bet you will relate.

MIDLIFE SPRING BREAK

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #41 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE SPRING BREAK


Let's take a break and embrace the wonders of the Spring.

It is the season of new beginnings.
Imagine ...
Plan ...
Do ...

Or
Just be ...

Most of all
ENJOY!!!

MIDLIFE FRIENDS TALK - REALITY CHECK PART 2

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MISERY AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #40 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDS TALK - REALITY CHECK PART 2


We are putting the finishing touches on our plan for The Big Talk.

Ideally
You begin to express your feelings.
Reality Check
*Your friend interrupts before you finish the first sentence.

Ideally
You ask to continue speaking without interruption.
Reality Check
Your friend:
 *refuses to stay and listen.
* sticks around to hear what you say. Then she walks out
* responds with strong words, shouts, tears and ...

Ideally
You thoroughly and flawlessly state what you want and need to make the friendship work.
Reality Check
*You have to listen (and hear) your friend state what she wants and needs to
make the friendship work.

UNHOMEWORK
Which one of the above reactions is your friend likely to bring to The Big Talk?
Can you predict what she wants and needs from the friendship?
Are you willing to hear what she says?
Are you willing to follow through?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
The Big Talk Aftermath
... we resolved ...

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:         drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:   www.facebook.com/drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.'
I bet you will relate.



*

MIDLIFE FRIENDS TALK - REALITY CHECK PART 1

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #39 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDS TALK - REALITY CHECK PART 1


We make the decision to have The Big Talk with a friend (or two).

We carefully plan and prepare.
Ideally
From invitation to aftermath, The Big Talk goes smoothly.
Reality Check
We cannot plan or prepare for everything.
 *Expect the unexpected.

You invite your friend to meet.
Ideally
Your friend agrees - no questions asked.
Reality Check
Your friend asks questions.
*why, what, how come
*etc. etc. etc.

Finally, the day of The Big Talk Arrives.
Ideally
You flawlessly express your feelings concerning the friendship.
Reality Check
The unexpected happens.
*You forget your reading glasses and can't read your notes.
*Surprise. At the last minute, your friend (or you) has to cancel.
*The Talk gets interrupted by a neighbor who stops by to chat.
*... and so on.

TO BE CONTINUED ...

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Reality Checks provide further preparation for The Big Talk.


UNHOMEWORK
What  'reality checks,' specific to your situation, need to be included in
your preparation?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
MIDLIFE FRIENDS TALK - REALITY CHECK PART 2

HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com

NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:          drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:    www.facebook.com/drwendykyman

TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011' '2012.'
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.'
I bet you will relate.