WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #29 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION
By the double milestone® point in our lives, we have been there, done that and said much.
How many New Year's resolutions have we made? Bazillions!
How many New Year's resolutions have we broken? Gazillions!
Who remembers?
Resolutions usually involve promising to do things we don't want to do
and give up things we want to do.
No thanks. We are so over all that.
This year, let's try a new approach.
Resolve to set a happy goal: By next New Year, you will have a least one quality friendship.
Hopefully, two or three.
Will we like this? Of course.
Will it be good for us to have a quality friend? Absolutely.
So ... it is possible to have something we like and that is also good for us. Hooray!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
For those who make this resolution - terrific.
If you do not have to make this resolution because you already achieved this
goal - fabulous, but .... stay tuned for other goals to set.
UNHOMEWORK
Do you already have a description of quality friendships? (From last week's posting)
If not - describe your version of a quality friendship.
Once you have your description written down, prioritize:
*What traits are most important for your quality friend to have?
*What traits are least important for your quality friend to have?
*Are you open to compromise on any friendship traits?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Decluttering Midlife Friendships
... out with the old, in with the new ... Why should we?
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe', you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES, click '2010' '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess.'
I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP HOLIDAY GIFT
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
Blog #28 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP HOLIDAY GIFT
The holidays are here - lots of cheer and celebration ... ummm ... hopefully.
We gather together with family and friends .... well ... maybe.
Aside from family, are you sharing the holidays with at least one quality friend?
If you don't have any quality friends sharing the holidays with you - why not?
Is it something you want?
Having at least one quality friend is an excellent gift to put on your holiday wish list.
Begin by setting a goal: By next year's holiday season, you will have quality friendships.
Consider this your gift - from you to you. Fantastic!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
It is indeed a treasure to have at least one quality friendship.
If you have more than one - congratulations.
UNHOMEWORK
Describe your version of quality friendships.
If you have one (or more):
● Were your friendships always quality or did it require 'work' to get there?
● Who did the 'work' - you, your friends or both?
If you do not have any quality friendships:
● Do you know why not?
● Are you willing to 'work' for them?
If you don't know, stay tuned ... more to come.
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife Friendship New Year's Resolution
... how many New Year's resolutions have we broken ...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES - click '2010', '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'.
I bet you will relate.
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
Blog #28 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP HOLIDAY GIFT
The holidays are here - lots of cheer and celebration ... ummm ... hopefully.
We gather together with family and friends .... well ... maybe.
Aside from family, are you sharing the holidays with at least one quality friend?
If you don't have any quality friends sharing the holidays with you - why not?
Is it something you want?
Having at least one quality friend is an excellent gift to put on your holiday wish list.
Begin by setting a goal: By next year's holiday season, you will have quality friendships.
Consider this your gift - from you to you. Fantastic!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
It is indeed a treasure to have at least one quality friendship.
If you have more than one - congratulations.
UNHOMEWORK
Describe your version of quality friendships.
If you have one (or more):
● Were your friendships always quality or did it require 'work' to get there?
● Who did the 'work' - you, your friends or both?
If you do not have any quality friendships:
● Do you know why not?
● Are you willing to 'work' for them?
If you don't know, stay tuned ... more to come.
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife Friendship New Year's Resolution
... how many New Year's resolutions have we broken ...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES - click '2010', '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'.
I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP DRAMA
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #27 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP DRAMA
Who needs the drama?
As we journey through the double milestone® of menopausal mayhem
and aging angst, most of us are not in the mood for any dramatic encounters.
With this in mind, how do we end a friendship?
Can the unwanted drama be avoided? Unlikely!
Some of us do attempt to avoid it by choosing silence.
We let the friendship die from neglect.
We just happen to be unavailable to spend time together - Never!
Our phone conversations get interrupted - Always!
And, we seem to forget to call back - Uh huh!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Do you believe your avoidance is working?
Do you care?
Your concern, or lack of it, clearly expresses your feelings.
UNHOMEWORK
How will your friend react when she gets your silent message? She will!
How will you respond? Will you?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife Friendship Holiday Gift
... It is holiday time. Lots of ...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe', you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES - click '2010' '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'.
I bet you will relate.
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #27 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP DRAMA
Who needs the drama?
As we journey through the double milestone® of menopausal mayhem
and aging angst, most of us are not in the mood for any dramatic encounters.
With this in mind, how do we end a friendship?
Can the unwanted drama be avoided? Unlikely!
Some of us do attempt to avoid it by choosing silence.
We let the friendship die from neglect.
We just happen to be unavailable to spend time together - Never!
Our phone conversations get interrupted - Always!
And, we seem to forget to call back - Uh huh!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Do you believe your avoidance is working?
Do you care?
Your concern, or lack of it, clearly expresses your feelings.
UNHOMEWORK
How will your friend react when she gets your silent message? She will!
How will you respond? Will you?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife Friendship Holiday Gift
... It is holiday time. Lots of ...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe', you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVES - click '2010' '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'.
I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP DUMP
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #26 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP DUMP
Many double milestoners® are facing the reality of ending friendships.
Most of us let go of just one or two.
And then, there are those who make a clean sweep by dumping each and every friend. Wow!
Reasons for the endings vary from friend to friend.
For one, perhaps you have changed. She has not.
For another, both of you have changed - not in the same ways.
Or quite simply, your menopausal/aging stuff is conflicting with your friend's
menopausal/aging stuff. Sums it up quite nicely, don't you think?
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
You may not be able to pinpoint precise reasons for ending friendships.
For now, the double milestone may be your only motivation.
Eventually, you will gain clarity. Ummm ... probably... depends on how this aging thing goes.
UNHOMEWORK
If you choose to end a friendship (or friendships), do you know why?
Is your decision spontaneous?
Or, have you spent lots of time thinking it over? What finally caused you to say 'NOW'?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife Friendship Drama
... we are not in the mood for The Big Drama breakup. Or are we ... ?
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe', you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010', '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'.
I bet you will relate.
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #26 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP DUMP
Many double milestoners® are facing the reality of ending friendships.
Most of us let go of just one or two.
And then, there are those who make a clean sweep by dumping each and every friend. Wow!
Reasons for the endings vary from friend to friend.
For one, perhaps you have changed. She has not.
For another, both of you have changed - not in the same ways.
Or quite simply, your menopausal/aging stuff is conflicting with your friend's
menopausal/aging stuff. Sums it up quite nicely, don't you think?
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
You may not be able to pinpoint precise reasons for ending friendships.
For now, the double milestone may be your only motivation.
Eventually, you will gain clarity. Ummm ... probably... depends on how this aging thing goes.
UNHOMEWORK
If you choose to end a friendship (or friendships), do you know why?
Is your decision spontaneous?
Or, have you spent lots of time thinking it over? What finally caused you to say 'NOW'?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife Friendship Drama
... we are not in the mood for The Big Drama breakup. Or are we ... ?
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe', you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010', '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'.
I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP EXPIRATION DATE
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND
AGING ANGST
BLOG #25 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP EXPIRATION DATE
Make a list of your current friends.
If you met each one today:
*Would you choose her as a friend? Why?
*Would you not choose her as a friend? Why not?
Note your reaction to your responses.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Friends meet different needs at different times in our lives.
During the double milestone® we become aware that some have
reached their expiration date?
UNHOMEWORK
What are you going to do about your expired friendships?
Are there reasons you are reluctant to end these friendships?
I know many of us don't feel like dealing with this now.
When would be a better time?
Is there a better time?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
The Midlife Friendship Dump
...If you choose to end a friendship...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com.
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010', '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess' tale.
I bet you will relate.
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND
AGING ANGST
BLOG #25 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP EXPIRATION DATE
Make a list of your current friends.
If you met each one today:
*Would you choose her as a friend? Why?
*Would you not choose her as a friend? Why not?
Note your reaction to your responses.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Friends meet different needs at different times in our lives.
During the double milestone® we become aware that some have
reached their expiration date?
UNHOMEWORK
What are you going to do about your expired friendships?
Are there reasons you are reluctant to end these friendships?
I know many of us don't feel like dealing with this now.
When would be a better time?
Is there a better time?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
The Midlife Friendship Dump
...If you choose to end a friendship...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com.
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010', '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess' tale.
I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
GRATITUDE AT MIDLIFE
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #24 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
GRATITUDE AT MIDLIFE
Thanksgiving is an appropriate time to take a break from our friendship issues.
Instead, let's focus on the spirit of Thanksgiving - gratitude.
During the double milestone®, it is tempting to focus on our disappointments, longings and losses.
If you want to purge this negativity, practice gratitude. It works!
It transforms your life by changing your perspective - even during menopausal mayhem
and aging angst.
Gratitude is acknowledging and appreciating our abundance.
Incorporating gratitude into our daily thoughts and activities is amazingly powerful.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Interestingly, the things we take for granted are often our biggest blessings.
UNHOMEWORK
Begin.
Write a gratitude list.
Read it each morning and night.
Who and what is on your list? Why?
Keep adding to your list.
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife Friendship Expiration Date
... have some of your friends passed their expiration date...?
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
email - drwendykyman@gmail.com
facebook - www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVE, click '2010', '2011'.
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'.
I bet you will relate.
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #24 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
GRATITUDE AT MIDLIFE
Thanksgiving is an appropriate time to take a break from our friendship issues.
Instead, let's focus on the spirit of Thanksgiving - gratitude.
During the double milestone®, it is tempting to focus on our disappointments, longings and losses.
If you want to purge this negativity, practice gratitude. It works!
It transforms your life by changing your perspective - even during menopausal mayhem
and aging angst.
Gratitude is acknowledging and appreciating our abundance.
Incorporating gratitude into our daily thoughts and activities is amazingly powerful.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Interestingly, the things we take for granted are often our biggest blessings.
UNHOMEWORK
Begin.
Write a gratitude list.
Read it each morning and night.
Who and what is on your list? Why?
Keep adding to your list.
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Midlife Friendship Expiration Date
... have some of your friends passed their expiration date...?
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
email - drwendykyman@gmail.com
facebook - www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right, under BLOG ARCHIVE, click '2010', '2011'.
Keep scrolling to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos, especially
'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'.
I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
OLD FRIENDS
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #23 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
OLD FRIENDS
As we journey through the double milestone® of menopausal mayhem and aging
angst, it is common to reflect on the past. Each reflection carries special memories,
some we cherish, some we'd like to forget.
We may fixate on past decisions, some good, some not; long ago events, some happy,
some sad; and old friends, some still in our lives, some long gone.
If we share memories with an old friend, we feel...???; we remember...???; we wish...???
If we share memories of an old friends, we feel...?; we remember...???; we wish...???
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Is it possible that a group, or even one friend, can stay with us throughout all
of life's seasons?
UNHOMEWORK
Do you have at least one long lasting friendship?
If no, do you wish for one?
If yes, how have you maintained the friendship?
Are you in touch with your childhood best friend? college roommate? or other old friends?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Gratitude At Midlife
... During the double milestone, it is tempting to...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click 'follower' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one
or
just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right- under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010' or '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'. I bet you will relate.
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #23 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
OLD FRIENDS
As we journey through the double milestone® of menopausal mayhem and aging
angst, it is common to reflect on the past. Each reflection carries special memories,
some we cherish, some we'd like to forget.
We may fixate on past decisions, some good, some not; long ago events, some happy,
some sad; and old friends, some still in our lives, some long gone.
If we share memories with an old friend, we feel...???; we remember...???; we wish...???
If we share memories of an old friends, we feel...?; we remember...???; we wish...???
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Is it possible that a group, or even one friend, can stay with us throughout all
of life's seasons?
UNHOMEWORK
Do you have at least one long lasting friendship?
If no, do you wish for one?
If yes, how have you maintained the friendship?
Are you in touch with your childhood best friend? college roommate? or other old friends?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Gratitude At Midlife
... During the double milestone, it is tempting to...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click 'follower' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one
or
just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right- under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010' or '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'. I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #22 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
Has your attitude toward your friends recently changed?
Duhhh! Absolutely it has.
Have you already dumped most, if not all, of them?
Or, have friends already dumped you? Hard to believe, but true!
Disruptions in our relationships occur with surprising, and somewhat
unexpected, frequency as we journey through the double milestone®.
UNHOMEWORK
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Old Friends
THE SWAMP GODDESS® TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #22 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
Has your attitude toward your friends recently changed?
Duhhh! Absolutely it has.
Have you already dumped most, if not all, of them?
Or, have friends already dumped you? Hard to believe, but true!
Disruptions in our relationships occur with surprising, and somewhat
unexpected, frequency as we journey through the double milestone®.
So what's going on?
Aging angst and menopausal mayhem are affecting all our relationships.
Aging angst and menopausal mayhem are affecting all our relationships.
That's what's going on.
Some of us try to pretend we are still able to tolerate what has become intolerable
and accept what has become unacceptable.
and accept what has become unacceptable.
Externally we attempt to carry out the charade, but internally we are
busy collecting grievances, both small and large.
busy collecting grievances, both small and large.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Is your grievance collection taking up so much space there is no room
for anything else?
for anything else?
UNHOMEWORK
List your triggers.
Specify the actions and words that push your double milestone buttons. You
know, the ones where your friend is getting on your last nerve and if she
keeps this up, you'll...
know, the ones where your friend is getting on your last nerve and if she
keeps this up, you'll...
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
Old Friends
...Is it possible that a group, or even one friend, can stay with us throughout all
of life's seasons...?
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click 'followers' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
EMAIL: drwendykyman@gmail.com
FACEBOOK: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right - under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010' or '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'. I bet you will relate.
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right - under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010' or '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess'. I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP REALITY 101
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
BLOG # 21
Have you drooled (not pretty, but known to happen) over media depictions
of friendships?
Have you seen or read the books, articles, movies and tv shows celebrating the
joys of friendships and extolling their crucial role in women's lives.
In these tales, women are present for each other, no matter what time of day
(or night), totally available, supportive, loving and giving.
This description of friendship reinforces what we have heard forever, such as:
* friendships are essential to women.
* we rely on our friends to share most, if not all, aspects of our lives.
Then we look at our own lives.
Uh-oh, something is missing.
We do not have these types of friendships.
In fact
*many of us are painfully aware that not all our friendships are joyous
or worthy of celebration.
In fact
*our friendships have conditions, rules, clear lines we can't cross, certain
times we can not rely on them, etc. etc. etc.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
What is going on?
The double milestone® of menopausal mayhem and aging angst is going on.
UNHOMEWORK
List the friends you can you can rely on unconditionally - no matter what.
List the friends who have restrictions on their availability.
Now look at yourself. Yikes!
Are you available for all of your friends, all of the time?
List those friends. Why these friends?
List the friends to whom you limit your availability. Why?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
...Has your attitude toward your friends changed during menopausal mayhem
and aging angst? Duhhh - absolutely!...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife memos is posted weekly.
If you click 'follower' or 'subscribe' you will
automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.Midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right - under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010' or '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess' tale.
I bet you will relate.
THE SWAMP GODDESS®GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
BLOG # 21
Have you drooled (not pretty, but known to happen) over media depictions
of friendships?
Have you seen or read the books, articles, movies and tv shows celebrating the
joys of friendships and extolling their crucial role in women's lives.
In these tales, women are present for each other, no matter what time of day
(or night), totally available, supportive, loving and giving.
This description of friendship reinforces what we have heard forever, such as:
* friendships are essential to women.
* we rely on our friends to share most, if not all, aspects of our lives.
Then we look at our own lives.
Uh-oh, something is missing.
We do not have these types of friendships.
In fact
*many of us are painfully aware that not all our friendships are joyous
or worthy of celebration.
In fact
*our friendships have conditions, rules, clear lines we can't cross, certain
times we can not rely on them, etc. etc. etc.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
What is going on?
The double milestone® of menopausal mayhem and aging angst is going on.
UNHOMEWORK
List the friends you can you can rely on unconditionally - no matter what.
List the friends who have restrictions on their availability.
Now look at yourself. Yikes!
Are you available for all of your friends, all of the time?
List those friends. Why these friends?
List the friends to whom you limit your availability. Why?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
...Has your attitude toward your friends changed during menopausal mayhem
and aging angst? Duhhh - absolutely!...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife memos is posted weekly.
If you click 'follower' or 'subscribe' you will
automatically receive each new one.
Or
Just come back to www.Midlifememos.com
NOTE
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwendykyman
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right - under BLOG ARCHIVE - click '2010' or '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess' tale.
I bet you will relate.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
THE MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP RANT
WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #20 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
Is it me? Am I the only one who is often confused, frequently amazed and increasingly
annoyed at most things my friends say and do?
Is it me? Have I been doing something that turns the women I thought were friends
into shrieking, nagging, whining, self centered shrews?
Is it me? Were my friends like this all along and it's just now I am noticing what
I previously ignored?
Is it me? If I met these women today, would I choose them as friends; would they
choose me?
Is it me? Are there others uttering the silent roar - "Help! I am surrounded
by bitches" - oops, I mean friends?
Are you shocked to read these questions?
Actually, they summarize comments from the countless women who have shared their stories
of eroding friendships for my upcoming book Help! I Am Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Keep in mind, everything is a bit over the top during menopausal mayhem and
aging angst.
UNHOMEWORK
In what ways can you relate to the questions posed?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
Do you maintain a collection of small and big grievances against your friends...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'follower' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one
Or
just come back to www.midlifememos.com
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS:
To the right - under 'blog archive' - click '2010' & '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess' tale.
I bet you will relate.
THE SWAMP GODDESS GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM
AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #20 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
Is it me? Am I the only one who is often confused, frequently amazed and increasingly
annoyed at most things my friends say and do?
Is it me? Have I been doing something that turns the women I thought were friends
into shrieking, nagging, whining, self centered shrews?
Is it me? Were my friends like this all along and it's just now I am noticing what
I previously ignored?
Is it me? If I met these women today, would I choose them as friends; would they
choose me?
Is it me? Are there others uttering the silent roar - "Help! I am surrounded
by bitches" - oops, I mean friends?
Are you shocked to read these questions?
Actually, they summarize comments from the countless women who have shared their stories
of eroding friendships for my upcoming book Help! I Am Surrounded By Bitches: The Swamp Goddess Guide To Friendship Frenzy Amid Menopausal Mayhem And Aging Angst.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Keep in mind, everything is a bit over the top during menopausal mayhem and
aging angst.
UNHOMEWORK
In what ways can you relate to the questions posed?
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
Do you maintain a collection of small and big grievances against your friends...
HELPFUL HINTS
Midlife Memos is posted weekly.
If you click on 'follower' or 'subscribe' you will automatically receive each new one
Or
just come back to www.midlifememos.com
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS:
To the right - under 'blog archive' - click '2010' & '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier Midlife Memos,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess' tale.
I bet you will relate.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Menopausal Mayhem and Aging Angst
WHO HAS MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST?
WE DO!!!
Most of our lives we contend with one significant milestone at a time.
Now, two milestones - menopause and midlife - at once.
I label this the double milestone®
Doesn't it seem like a really bad cosmic joke?
Midlife Memos is an online guide that chronicles our journey through
the murky waters of menopausal mayhem and aging angst.
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right - under 'blog archive' - click on '2010' & '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier blog posts,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess®' tale.
I bet you will relate.
WE DO!!!
Most of our lives we contend with one significant milestone at a time.
Now, two milestones - menopause and midlife - at once.
I label this the double milestone®
Doesn't it seem like a really bad cosmic joke?
Midlife Memos is an online guide that chronicles our journey through
the murky waters of menopausal mayhem and aging angst.
TO READ PREVIOUS POSTS
To the right - under 'blog archive' - click on '2010' & '2011'.
Keep scrolling all the way to read any, or all, of the earlier blog posts,
especially 'The Birth of Swamp Goddess®' tale.
I bet you will relate.
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